You must be extreme for a truly remarkable life (moderation is mediocrity)

Whenever I do calisthenics in public, at least one person will come up to me and ask me how I do what I do.

They may see me doing pushups in a handstand, or other calisthenics moves that seemingly defy gravity, and understandably they want to know the secret to unlocking a skill that most people will never be able to do.

I never quite know how to respond because there’s no fancy explanation for it.  There’s no secret that, if a person knows, they’ll suddenly gain mastery over their body.

So, I find myself repeatedly explaining that the only thing that unlocks any of this stuff is a combination of both time and repetition.

I do still believe this to be true, but I’ve always felt like that’s an unsatisfactory answer, because I know that it requires something deeper than that, but I could never quite articulate it.  There is an underlying factor that drives a person to even want to put in the time and repetition required to become good at it.

Lately I’ve decided to put a bit more thought into this, because the formula that has helped me to have mastery over my body and my movements is the same formula that has put me in a position to leave the corporate American rat race and live a far more peaceful life here in Europe.

Now that I’ve thought about it, I realize that the one word that I would use to describe what it takes to do remarkable things is “extremism.”

I don’t mean this in a political or ideological sense. I mean it from the perspective of lifestyle and daily habits.

In fact, let’s take a moment to understand what it means to be extreme in the first place, because the word often comes with a negative connotation.

Extreme (adj):

1. going to the utmost or very great lengths in action or habit.

2. exceeding the bounds of moderation.

I think we can take things a bit further by asking CerebriX what it means to be extreme.

“To be extreme means deviating from societal norms to live in radical alignment with one’s own personal values.” – CerebriX

Being extreme is the underlying factor that gives a person drive and determination to invest an ungodly amount of time and energy into something that yields remarkable results.

In a world where the average American owns about 20,000 items, an extreme person may chose to only own whatever they can fit in a suitcase, thus enjoying a remarkably simple life.

The average American has over $100k in total debt, but an extreme person may have a policy of only buying in cash, no matter what, thus enjoying a life free of debt.

To be extreme simply means that you are very far removed from the average.

• Michael Jordan was an extremist.

• Steve Jobs was an extremist.

• Mozart was an extremist.

Buddhist monks are also extremists because they deviate far from the average person. They intentionally pursue a life of frugality and intense focus on mindfulness which enables them to achieve a state of enlightenment that your average person couldn’t conceive.

When it comes to health, fitness, and calisthenics, I’d consider myself an extremist because I possess an underlying drive that compels me to dedicate far more effort into my craft than the average person is willing to do.

Everyone has the power to be extreme in their own respective way, but it’s not something that you just wake up and start doing. It takes a bit of intentionality, and it requires that you focus a disproportionate amount of life energy on ONE thing, so much so that the universe has no choice but to conspire in one’s favor.

And that’s the main takeaway here.  If you want to live a remarkable life, meaning your life is so out of the ordinary that it stands out and compels people to take notice, then you need to be an extremist in whatever category of life is of the highest priority to you.

If you want to live a remarkably peaceful and low stress life, then you need to go to extremes that most are unwilling to go when it comes to rejecting consumerism and other things that are staples in the lives of your average American.

If you want to achieve a remarkable level of freedom and autonomy, then you need to be extreme in curating your life in a way that allows for that.

If you want to be in the absolute best physical and mental health possible, then you must be extreme in your pursuit of habits and rituals that will return health and fitness results that most may envy but certainly will never enjoy.

So, what does it actually take to be extreme?

Well in this article I’ll give you the three key requirements that I think make up the foundations for becoming an extremist, thus leading to a truly remarkable life.  

Requirement number one is to channel your obsessive energy towards your innate curiosities.

We all obsess over something. Whether you realize it or not you have obsessive energy that manifests itself in different ways.

I’d say most people adopt what I call the “default obsessions of society” which generally entail some form of pursuing instant gratification. This can be things like recreational shopping, being emotionally attached to a sports team, or advancing up the career ladder.

There’s plenty more than that, but I think you get the idea. The problem is that, as I stated before, these obsessions are societal defaults, meaning they are driven by cultural influences rather than innate desire.

On the other hand, it’s also possible to have obsessions that are innate to a person’s being. These are the things that people feel an intrinsic compulsion to pursue.

Call these “primal inclinations,” if you will.

I learned about the concept of “primal inclinations” from Robert Greene, the author of the book Mastery.

“You possess a kind of inner force that seeks to guide you toward your Life’s Task….  In childhood this force was clear to you.  It directed you toward activities and subjects that fit your natural inclinations, that sparked a curiosity that was deep and primal.” – Robert Greene

Throughout your life, society likely encouraged you to suppress your primal inclinations and replace them with the default obsessions of society.

But with a bit of introspection, you can uncover your primal inclinations and begin to channel your life energy towards those innate things that spark your natural curiosities.

Perhaps you used to enjoy drawing or painting, which means that you may have a primal inclination for being creative.  If you were like me, you were probably a bit of a nerd and you enjoyed building things, which mean that you may have a primal inclination for turning disorder into order, or in other words, for creating systems.

Whatever it is, since it is innate within you, you’ll naturally find yourself not only willing but compelled to dedicate an above average amount of time and energy into the pursuit of that thing. 

So, uncover your primal inclinations, and focus a significant portion of your life on those things.

This is how you channel your obsessive energy towards your innate curiosities.

Requirement number two for becoming extreme is finding harmony between your obsessive energy and your purpose.

Obsession can be constructive, but it also has the power to be destructive. You can channel your obsessive energy toward your primal inclinations in a very good way or in a very bad way. 

Say you are a naturally competitive person, and you love the process of building highly profitable organizations.  That’s your primal inclination.  You can technically build an organized crime ring, or you can build a legitimate business. It’s different manifestations of the same thing.

Both involve you having an obsession that gives you the fuel to dedicate an extreme level of energy into a primal desire that you have, but one is probably counterproductive to your purpose, and the other is most likely aligned with your purpose.

I will let you decide which one is which for you, but the point is that being an extreme person in a way that translates to a remarkably good life requires alignment with your greater purpose.

It must lead you to adopt a mindset along with daily habits that are far beyond what the average person is willing to commit to, but only for things that inch you even closer towards turning your vision into a reality.

Because obsessive energy that is channeled haphazardly, without intention, and is not in harmony with your purpose leads to chaos.

So, it’s important to understand your purpose in life, along with the vision that you have for yourself, and to channel your obsessive energy accordingly.

This creates harmony and ensures that you’re not fixated on something that will steer you in the wrong direction.

The third requirement for becoming extreme is selectively engineering your environment.

Obsession is only obnoxious when in the presence of people who don’t share the same values as you. 

If you do spend time finding people and a support network that shares your values and your outlook on life, then you’ll strangely cease to be extreme within that particular circle of people. 

I cannot stress how much of a difference the people you interact with makes in your life.  In one setting you could be the crazy, unreasonable, and unattractive person, yet in a different setting you can be a genius who carries an attractive aura.

It highly depends on the environment you are in, and so you need to do what you can to custom tailor an environment that supports you for channeling your obsessive energy in a way that serves your purpose.

I say this because, as I mentioned earlier, being extreme makes people uncomfortable. When people can’t comprehend your level of dedication towards something, particularly when it’s something that yields extraordinarily positive results, they rationalize by discrediting you.

Despite years of extremely consistent effort and diving much deeper into understanding the human body than your average person, I’ve had many people chalk my physique and calisthenics skills to genetics and using performance enhancing substances.

But by curating a social circle of people who all do calisthenics and generally live on the extremes of society when it comes to health and fitness, I receive an overwhelmingly positive energy on a daily basis. I’m encouraged to further explore my innate curiosity for understanding what my body is capable of.

So, you should do the same for whatever area of life you decide mediocrity is no longer acceptable. Find people who support you. Find a community of people who share the same values. Insert yourself into a space where taking things to the extreme is expected.

So, go where you are celebrated. Go where your extreme pursuit of your purpose is totally normal. The right network of people supporting you will give you everything you need to thrive and create a truly remarkable life.

But of course, this is all under the pretense that you’ve built an obsession around your primal inclinations, and you’ve aligned them with your life’s purpose… because you don’t want to be in an environment that celebrates you for being extreme in the wrong way. 

This is the formula for becoming extreme.

If you do these three things, you channel your obsessive energy towards your innate curiosities, you harmonize it with your purpose, and you place yourself in an environment where you are celebrated, then you should have the ingredients necessary for being an extreme person who drives truly remarkable results for yourself in whichever aspect of life is most important to you.

I’ll close out by saying I wrote this article with the help of CerebriX, which is the AI tool that I created to help people like yourself find structured solutions for cutting the distractions out of your life, and getting locking in on finally building the life you truly want for yourself.

And if you’re ready to start taking concrete actions to change your life, you can also pick up the “Self-Reinvention Cheat Code” which is a field manual to help you get started in creating a new life for yourself in just 60 days.